’Cause it’s the Pick of Destiny, child
You know we will be rockin’ ’cause it’s fuckin’ insane
It’s just the Pick of Destiny, child
More precious than a diamond on a platinum chain

In Venice Beach there was a man named Kage
When he was buskin’ he was all the rage
He met Jables and he taught him well
All the techniques that were developed in Hell

Cock-pushups and the power slide
Gig simulation, now there’s nowhere to hide
They formed a band they named Tenacious D
And then they got the Pick Of Destiny

'Cause it’s the Pick of Destiny, child
You know we will be rockin’ ’cause it’s fuckin’ insane
It’s just the Pick of Destiny, child
Our tasty grooves are better than a chicken chow mein

'Cause he who is sleazy is easy to pleasy
And she who is juicy must be loosy-goosey
And he who is groovy will be in my movie
So come on

The wizard and the demon had a battle royale
The demon almost killed him with an evil kapow
But then he broke his tooth
And thus the demon said, „Ow.”

'Cause it’s the Pick of Destiny, child
You know we will be rockin’ ’cause it’s fuckin’ insane
It’s just the Pick of Destiny, child
You know our movie’s better than The Citizen Kane

'Cause he who’s a geezer must live in my freezer
And she who is snarky is full of malarkey
And he who is groovy must be in my movie
So come on

'Cause if you’re a diva, then go to Geneva
And if you’re a crony, then suck on my boney
And if you are groovy, then get in my movie
It’s called the Pick of Destiny
The Pick of Destiny